One Choice
by sky75rk
Summary: When Rukawa's dreams become more important than the spikyhaired boy. When Sendoh decides to follow through with Rukawa's decision. When Rukawa feels guilty. When Sendoh closes the door. [SenRu.Vignette]


**One Choice **

**By: sky75rk **

**To you, Mizuno Heiko, who loves SenRu with all your heart. **

Standard disclaimers apply.

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_I gave you a choice once. _

"I'm going to America," Rukawa said, those eyes that usually held in them a spark of happiness died when the seriousness in Rukawa's baby blue irises never left.

But he refused to listen.

_I gave you a choice once. _

"You're joking, right?" Sendoh asked, panic settling in. "Right?" he pressed on.

In the years they've gone through, they never once mentioned anything about this. Never at all.

Sendoh thought they were content. That _he_ was content. His lover laughed with him, joked with him—even shared a few pranks with him. Everything had been perfect. All those times had been perfect—until now.

Bliss never did seem to last forever.

Rukawa did not break the silence. Instead, he tried to lift it up by going towards Sendoh to comfort him. To explain—or at least try to. He thought about this for far too long. He knew that it was bound to be received this way.

The typically stoic boy held out his hand and stretched his long, sinewy arm. But before he could reach Sendoh—his Akira—he heard a soft whisper of desperation from the now slumped, spiky-haired boy. "Why?" he said. _Why are you talking about this now? Why are you deciding this? Why are you throwing away what we have? Why are you leaving me? _

_I gave you a choice once, remember? And you chose me. _

Sendoh heard a heavy sigh from the stoic boy and still he refused to meet his eyes. He was afraid that once he saw the content of those blue eyes, he will have no option but to admit defeat. He was weak that way.

Only to him.

"Regrets," the deep voice finally said and Sendoh's fears worsened and tripled a multitude.

"Regrets" he echoed, and then clenched his fists. "Regrets?" the anger was coursing, pooling and growing fire within him. The emotion pulses and starts to cloud his mind. Fury seeks to be free, to run wild before insanity claims him first. He refused to understand this. He refused to understand _him_. "Are you telling me that you fucking regret the years we've been together? Damn it Kaede! Do I mean nothing to you?" anger blazed and it overflows. Sendoh was shaking uncontrollably.

Rukawa interrupts. "Akira I--" words failed him. He wanted to tell Sendoh that he was wrong. His accusations were wrong. But the words he never trusted, but now needed turned him down once again.

However, this time, he won't leave things hanging.

Rukawa swallowed inaudibly, forming words in his mind. He owed Sendoh an explanation, at least. "I don't regret anything I've done with you," his voice was soft, honest, and clear.

"But why?" he wants to obtain the truth. What would be more important than _them? _

"I'm thankful that you came into my life, Akira. But I can't live without knowing what could've happened if I chased my dream. 'Where would I be now? How far would I have come?' Those questions plagued my mind and I hate myself more everyday," Rukawa paused and stared meaningfully into Sendoh's surprised eyes as if conveying a message then continued. "I hate myself that I gave up pursuing a dream I had since childhood because,"

"…Because you met me," Sendoh abruptly finished.

Rukawa stood up and roughly pushed Sendoh to sit down. "Don't ever say that," his voice darkened and Sendoh suppressed a shiver. "That's not what I intended to say,"

Sendoh pushed him off, his strength renewed. "But that is what you meant! If you haven't met me and stayed here in Japan then you would've come to America," he stated a fact and he was met with silence. Sendoh laughed hollowly at the obviousness of the stoic boy.

It was now Rukawa's turn to be surprised.

_I gave you a choice once, remember? And you chose me. And when you did, I was ready to give up everything to follow the choice you made. _

"I gave up my dream to be with you too, Kaede," he told the stoic boy. "Did you think that you were the only one leaving something behind?"

"W-what?"

"I was recruited to play for one of the teams in the NBA. All I had to do was to go there and demonstrate my abilities. But I turned them down,"

This was the first. The first time he heard this from Sendoh. The first time he felt guilty. The first time he wanted to be angry at the spiky-haired boy that was his lover.

Sendoh Akira had the golden opportunity in front of him, but he chose to leave it behind.

Why?

"Why?"

It was then at that moment, when Sendoh raised his head to meet those eyes that Rukawa owned, he saw emotions he never knew a person was capable to express. It frightened him, and at the same time, it warmed him that such expressions were directed to him and only him and no one would be able to take it away.

"I gave you a choice once, remember?" Sendoh started, his face neutral. "And you chose me," he smiled at the memory it brought and Rukawa continued to be entranced at the sight of him. "And when you did, I was ready to give up everything to follow the choice you made,"

With that, he turned around and proceeded to walk away. He stopped suddenly when he reached the door. "But it seems that you made yet another choice, Kaede," he said as he opened the door. "And I'm ready to follow through for you again,"

_Anything for you… that's how much you mean to me. _

The hollowness of the room echoed in his mind and the house was barren. But nothing… absolutely nothing could compare to the emptiness that filled his heart the moment Sendoh stepped out the door.

After all, this was his choice, right?

**-Owari-**

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Note: Tell me if you like to have a sequel with a happy ending.

**Review?**


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